Indecision2009
I'm still in a wretched state of indecision on whether to stay in Rome or go to Bosnia at the end of this week. This is a chance for all you silent readers to make a contribution. I don't often have Bikey-style dilemmas but this certainly qualifies and I'll try to put the case to you all clearly.
Option 1- Continue Roman job-hunt
Pros:
-I have no-strings-or-guilt-attached free living (food and board) in Central Rome
-Related to above- supportive family base so I won't be lonesome
-Am learning Italian quickly- averaging around 3 hours free lessons a day and up to 6 hours if i want.
-Have made a couple of fledgling friendships already- Valeria, whose teacherly instincts means she wants me to forget she speaks english, but if i spoke in italian alone conversation would progress at a painfully slow pace. With young Arafa I can have a more equal language exchange though her english is far better than my italian we both need practise.
-EU country so I can stay for an unlimited time.
-I can earn far more money because the job won't involve paying over 400 quid in plane tickets.
-I have at least couple of job leads.
-If I get a job I can work for a few months at least.
-My aunt is happy to have someone around for general chatter, shopping and help convincing her husband to buy a sewing machine. I don't actually say anything but she can use me as an argument in building her case for one, cause I definitely wouldn't let it just gather dust.
-I'm already here (duh) so there's no bustling around sorting tickets and documents and other headaches.
Cons:
-Everything is very indefinite compared to the Sarajevo gig.
-I've done the touristy thing here at least and I'd really like to try Bosnian living.
-I have family support but they live in a generally isolated immigrant community so it's harder to integrate socially. And I'm not the norm within that community either so there's the extreme of excessive curiosity and unwanted attention (eg, guys in language school) and wariness (the better-heeled Italian public)Young Arafa says that there isn't even a young muslim's type circle except for arab girls who keep things exclusive. Enquiries about socialising, movies etc drew a blank expression at first, then an explanation of her peers' strange fashionista attitudes. (Upon her commenting on a beautiful moon, her companion confusedly asking if she meant that thing up in the sky? Why? It's not like a painting or anything.. Which confused Arafa in turn)
-I won't have anyone looking out for me professionally- employment will be more sink or swim.
Bosnia on the other hand is a much simpler prospect. A short fixed term job in a city where I will have both professional support ( from Not Mr Bikey's mother) and a good social network who will give me a chance to be active in the wider community with their various community projects. The environment is just the kind of place and people that I would want to be part of- trying to be open and engaged, decent and academic. I'm obviously making it sound more utopian than reality but that is my overall vibe. I also have the whole free accomodation deal, and I would really welcome the peace of living on my own for a little while (I know I'm disgustingly fortunate - and I should take advantage of it right?) I like cooking anyway and could experiment with yummy Bosnian recipes for soup and pita and those walnutty syrupy apples. And cherry juice! Wow cherry juice.. I tried to find something like it in Manchester but it was a travesty of the Bosnian real deal.
There are two main BUTS which are
1) the cost of going and returning would absorb mos of my salary as it's only a 5 week deal. Which also means I'd be back in Manchester by May probably doing the call centre grind once more. Although I'm also thinking I should apply for a PGCE next year as it's probably what I'm most qualified for and I've generally gone for the path of least resistance form-wise.
2) The other BUT has i think mostly been overcome because miei genitori are now saying it's fine and 'if you must, but what if a robber climbs through the x-storey high window?' respectively.
It's also something I must decide asap cause the job would start next week!
Anyway my plan for today is to bake a belated birthday cake for myself using some bruised apples that are languishing in the fridge, and make it to language school. Also possibly check out a local yarn store I spied the other day.
posted by warm as toast at 12:55 pm
10 Comments:
wow, if u have a job already sorted out in bosnia for Definite then take it! pray istikhara of course and go with what feels best, but it sounds like that'd be much better for u, it's what u wanted to do anyway from before, and u won't be wasting ur time. tho i would say try very hard wt ur job apps in italy till the end of the week just in case coz u're learning the language so fast... xx
:) You read quick! I emailed the bosnian school inquiring whether they might give me the job in september. But I feel that's kind of audacious- expecting them to arrange everything on my terms when I'm just a puny inexperienced grad.
Did you hear back about Sept? Still think that would be best cos you could travel by land with Kerim and I then saving you travel money plus you'd be able to work for a bit longer then too right?
At the same time I think your PGCE thing sounds like a sensible if boring option - once you're qualified you can work as a supply teacher leaving you free to fulfil your art ambitions to your heart's content while doing a bit of teaching when you need some cash..
Why don't you at least follow up your Rome job leads first?
Ws
PS This is Sir Smile-a-Lot's (heehee) tuppence worth:
"Then again, being alone, foreign and brown in Bosnia doesn't sound right. I don't think I'd let you
do that..."
I haven't heard yet and sure I've followed up but no immediate prospects really. Plus the kids have worn khalu down about getting a pet so we'll soon be getting some kind of jumpy furball in the house..
Lol how sad Sir Smile-a-Lot won't permit you to be alone and brown in Bosnia.. This is why I'm travelling before thinking of marriage.
Tell me how to get in contact with the House of Smiles though (ie your shoshur's bari)
also would i be able to travel cheaply by land from rome?
Well it's because of safety reasons not cos he has me prisoner! And I don't think you should, despite these post-feminist times, think there's anything 'sad' with him not 'permitting' me either - I'm perfectly comfortable with traditional Islamic family values with the husband being the head of the household and in any case, it goes both ways, people just get upset when it's the husband not permitting the wife to do something and don't notice when it's the other way round.
relax bikey- lay down your cudgels.. I know sir smiley is perfectly affable really
He's not sir smile-a-lot!
Not Mr Bikey chose his wifey well.
I'm of Jug's mind.
ah i see why bikey was confused- the 'how sad' element must have unintentionally tipped the tone from incredulous to pitying. Tone is so difficult to convey without intonation..
Ohh, decisions decisions:
If you stay in Rome, you can pick up a whole new language properly, get free lodging rather than be totally skint in another country which is never fun.
Why not give Rome a bit more time? You've not even been there for a month yet...
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